(Yes that’s a terrible attempt at a headline for my quick review, sorry.)
I vowed not to buy another driving game for the Xbox - a quick count reveals that they make up two thirds of all the Xbox games I own - but what the hell, it was £7 at Amazon and it wasn’t bad on the PC. FlatOut is an arcade-style racing game with the emphasis on ‘realistic’ physics and, above all, the fun to be had in smashing your opponents off the road. But is it any good?
Fire it up and you’re met with a soundtrack that unfortunately screams “Hello, I’m Burnout 3. Except with unsigned bans that sound like shit.” (To be fair, a lot of the real bands in Burnout 3 sound like shit, too.) Once you get over such hardcore lyrics as “weed will blow your mind!” and get to the racing itself, FlatOut isn’t such a bad proposition. 
Crashes are beautiful. The fact that you are forced to watch as your driver is gratuitously catapulted from your car whenever they occur is less so - why, man, why? - especially as the ragdoll effects are best described as ‘rubbish‘.
Here, performing my trademark cornering maneuver (plowing into the car ahead rather than braking) is actively encouraged, rather than shunned as in the online play in titles such as Project Gotham Racing, where any such behaviour incurs you the (frequenently hilarious) wrath of ’serious’ gamers. I imagine this is a great game to play on Live, but I haven’t ventured on yet. Maybe when I stop being bloody banned (the sods).
The game is sadly let down by two main points, both of which arise from its insistence on ‘realistic’ physics. What’s so realistic about nobody wearing seatbelts is anyone’s guess, but I guess the developers felt the game was lacking a certain something. All right, that’s three things. The other two are even more fatal.
The game is called FlatOut. You might expect it therefore to feature some pretty fast driving, but thanks to the game’s settings - primarily on dirt tracks and, shock horror, ice - all you achieve by going flat out is a quick trip off into the dirt. Although it’s possible to have great fun on the tarmacked tracks, for the remainder the driving instructor part of your brain constantly reaching for the dual control brakes will spoil your enjoyment somewhat.
Second - the obstacles. All right, so crashing into a tyre wall in reality probably will result in nasty things getting stuck under your axle until you can’t move, but is it a fun situation to be in? Nope! Combine that with the slippery, loose surfaces of the game and you will frequently find yourself cursing your luck as you struggle to free yourself from some shattered fence or other.
The verdict? Fun, in a smashing-yourself-over-the-head, I-can-do-better-than-this, God-damn-it-I’ll-come-first-some-day kind of way. If you want pure, unadultered ‘flat out’ fun, try Burnout 3 instead. Better music too.
